Wanted: Bicycle Mechanic. Must have spent the last three decades working for crap money, keeping up with the endless flow of weird mechanical bullshit spewed out by the bike industry. The ideal candidate will be able to remember basic specifications of bikes and parts from the 1970s to the near future and be able to analyze and troubleshoot bizarre new designs on sight.
Work load will vary from nonexistent to ridiculous within minutes.
Applicant must be a highly intelligent, creative problem solver who is also enough of an idiot to get stuck in this business.
Pay somewhat exceeds minimum wage.