Remember "House?"

 In the medical drama "House," caustic genius Dr. Gregory House diagnosed mysterious afflictions that suddenly struck down the patient of the week, for eight seasons of often nauseating entertainment. The nasty genius used his mega mind, extensive education, and long experience to slice through the confusion and bring us the answer.

After the previous medical drama ER made patient -- and even doctor -- survival far less likely, viewers were trained not expect a happy ending. House delivered pretty often, but sometimes the patient died. Also, House would be wrong several times in the episode before delivering the right diagnosis within a few minutes of the end. After you watch a few, you realize that early certainties never pan out. "Do this!" House snaps at his team. We look at the clock and go, "Nah, that ain't it."

Without all of the good-looking actors, life and death stakes, and medical bills that would bankrupt a medium sized city, bike repair has become like episode after episode of House. A patient comes in with weird symptoms or what looks like a simple problem at first. We diagnose and treat. It fails. We try something else. Thing is, no one has bike medical insurance, so we the greasy healers are the ones who stand to lose a lot of money on these false starts.

Bike shops have no medical associations in which we share our experiences and publish papers in a journal. We don't know what other mechanics are doing. Online videos show either idealized versions of various procedures or selected experiences of individuals who may be amateurs and inexperienced. And if the video doesn't cover the exact model in the exact year that you're dealing with, the information might not help at all. On top of that, who has time to spend hours trolling through search results in hope of finding a tutorial that might not even be out there.

Forums may yield some useful knowledge, but are just as likely to attract experienced misinformation or loud, confident, and wrong newbies. You have to sift carefully to find cases that fit what's in front of you on your work stand.

The manufacturers really don't care if you can fix anything. They just want you to buy it. Ancestral sources like Sutherland's and Sheldon Brown can't keep up. We're thrown back on our experience and education -- such as it may be -- to analyze the problem.

With every added cog in the cassette, mechanical shifting gets more and more temperamental. As the manufacturers abandon what used to be the state of the art, replacement parts for that number of speeds are made more cheaply. This includes shifters and derailleurs. You had fancy ten-speed when it was the best? You're just part of the rabble now. Eleven speed is rapidly going the same way.

Any repair could turn into a frustrating mystery these days. I like a challenge, but most of this crap is just an affront. Parts are disappearing for the old, reliable, simple bikes, while tech support barely exists for the new, throwaway bikes. I get it: to a racer, the entire bike is as consumable as chains, tires, and tubes used to be. As long ago as the 1980s, racing was already turning into a massive science experiment. It has only gotten more so. Rider and machine need a complex support system to eke out those hundredths of a second per kilometer.

Advancements in racing technology through the 1970s improved quality for all riders, because we all used similar mechanisms, shaped slightly differently for variations like racing versus touring, and, later mountain biking. As disciplines diverged, particularly off-road, there was a lot less cross-pollination.

People here used to complain from time to time about the level of detail I would go into, but less time was wasted diving right in as opposed to dithering around trying to figure out how to avoid it. Lately, though, it seems that diving in doesn't assure solid results. Too many things have to work too perfectly together.

The road bike that's giving me fits right now was built on a bare frame in 2017. The owner rides hard. He raced a couple of short seasons, mostly just a nearby training series, but it's a competitive series. He rides with people who never go easy. Over the years, we have replaced gear cables and housings as necessary to restore precise shifting, along with chains and cassettes. This time, though, I can't get it to behave.

The brifter seemed to be worn out. It needed too much lever travel to engage, which meant that it didn't have enough left to climb to the low gear cog. I changed the brifter. It was crisper, but still did not have the reach. The chain gauged pretty new. We'd already changed all cables and housings with tried and true 5mm. The bottom bracket cable guide can't be removed because the bolt that threads into an insert in the BB is rusted in, and the insert itself is broken loose from the bottom bracket shell. It's been that way for years. It shouldn't matter as long as the guide stays in position. Cable tension should hold it.

I rigged a brifter in parallel, using full-length housing, to test the derailleur itself. It shifts the full range. So something in the cable system is eating lever travel. I can see motion where the cable housing enters the upper end of the downtube. There's a bit more waggle where the housing exits the chainstay near the derailleur. Is that enough to cause the problem? Parts are all original, and very simple. But the hole in the downtube could be worn. After all this, is the answer something simultaneously stupid and difficult?

Possibilities on the whiteboard: Maybe I should drill out the frame and run full-length housing. That's a one-way trip, though. How about using carbon-compatible epoxy to shim up the frame hole? But I don't want to glue the cable stop into the frame. That might make future cable changes even more time consuming.

I tried every combination of cable housing, including 4mm, 5mm, and mixing widths in case the flex characteristics of the 4mm handled the bends better than the 5mm we can get now. I'm happy to say that 4mm did nothing to help. Eventually, I put on a new brifter, new cassette, and the 5mm housing we had installed first when we thought it would be the routine repair we had completed successfully several times over the bike's life. I got it to hit every gear from the 39, and every gear but the Ned -- the full cross 53-28 -- from the big ring.

Given the option of taking the bike with the gears we could get or making permanent modifications to install full-length housing, the rider opted to take the bike as it is. He even said that it hadn't been getting the Ned for a while, and he was fine with that. We'll see how things go.

Nothing is a sure cure anymore. Every fix is temporary. Who needs another metaphor for life when we just want reliable machinery? I hop on my primitive bike, day after day, and just go. I can change a cable on the side of the road in about 15 leisurely minutes. If I get a flat, I put in a new inner tube, pump it up, and ride on.

What seems dangerous

 An 80-year-old woman driving a small SUV was obliterated by a drunk driver in a dump truck on Route 28 a couple of weeks ago. She was southbound. The truck driver was northbound. He crossed the centerline.

The skid marks, crumpled guard rail, and churned-up road shoulder gave mute witness to the horror that had unfolded in a few long seconds. The dump truck careened on its way to overturning, leaving broad, curved swaths of black. The SUV left straighter, fainter marks. The road had been closed for about six hours, but had reopened in time for me to ride through on my way home. Few but the investigators had seen the crash site at that point.

Over the ensuing days, the investigation continued, leaving more and more marks. There's a countdown to impact from each direction, and a mark where the vehicles collided. Cryptic notations on the pavement. Motorists seemed subdued for a day or two. It's hard to be impressed for long, when your own flow and schedule dominate your continuing life.

As a cyclist, I'm not only aware of my exposure to danger, I'm reminded of it regularly by people who remark on my own persistence as a road rider or tell me about how they decided to give it up. It's true: bicyclists don't have fender benders. If we get tagged, it leaves a mark, at the very least.

(Cartoon from 1984)

In your motor vehicle, you are not only required to stay out there in the lane and maintain speed, you have few options for a quick escape. Peer pressure generally enforces faster travel than the speed limit, although dedicated road blockers will ooze along. Even at annoyingly slow motorized speeds, the vehicles they're in have considerable mass and limited maneuverability. Most of the time, traffic rips along at the posted limit or higher. On a two-lane highway, you can easily race toward each other at 120 miles per hour. A motorcyclist might combine skill and luck to shoot a gap to survival, but skill is vital and luck is indispensable. A regular car, SUV, or light truck is just stuck there. If the antagonist is a dump truck, you know how it's going to end. In the recent crash on 28, the dump truck driver survived with minor enough injuries that he was able to go straight to jail. He laid the truck down and dumped its load, but got no more than banged up.

One message is clear: If you bought a large vehicle because you wanted greater crash safety, it better have been a dump truck.

As common as highway fatalities are, millions more people complete their trips each day than die or are injured in the attempt. It's not because all of those millions of drivers have perfect safety habits. It's because they get away with their foolish risks. If nothing goes wrong, was it really dangerous? 

A few nights ago, I heard a motorcycle blaze past my house at a speed that guaranteed that the rider's body would haunt the first responders for the rest of their lives. At that kind of speed, you don't even need to hit a deer. A porcupine, raccoon, or possum will do the trick. But the deer is highly likely, especially along that stretch. The idiot held his speed all the way out of earshot. The roar of the bike Dopplered away without ending abruptly.

Right now, raw milk has been getting a lot of press, because Robert F. Kennedy, Jr., is a big proponent of it. Scientific consensus agrees that you're better off drinking pasteurized milk, but no one is forcing you to take this precaution. Occasional explosive diarrhea keeps you cleaned out. Extended periods of it can be a big help with weight loss. Just be sure to stay hydrated with refreshing water from Rock Creek.

Our entire country is living through the risks ignored or welcomed by the small percentage of voters who embraced it and the other percentage who didn't care enough to come out and vote against it. We're roaring down a highway full of blind curves and hills, with occasional fog, and impaired drivers at the wheel.

I've said it before: risky behavior persists because most people get away with it. You could say the same thing about the few persistent road cyclists. We're fine until we're not. Our small size and relatively slow speed can be advantages as well as disadvantages. I'm constantly scanning for escape routes and mentally rehearsing situations suggested by conditions. When things get hectic, I have to trust the motorists. For the most part, they come through.

We hear from quitters all the time. El Queso Grande told someone out in the shop about yet another one who simply assumes that the majority of drivers are impaired in some way. Could be. I smell a lot of the wake-and-bake crowd on my morning commute. Major drawback to stinky weed, y'all. It advertises your choice to the world. The worst booze breath can't match that.

Then there's electronics. Our helpful devices feed us mostly useful navigation information, but also draw a glance or a lingering look for what seems like no time at all until you snap back and straighten out. Hopefully you do it before going completely into the ditch, down a ravine, through a crosswalk full of people, or into oncoming vehicles.

EQG's outlook could be soured by the fact that he developed medical conditions that severely limited his ability to ride. He may take comfort in the idea that it's a bad idea anyway. Who likes to see other people having fun when you can't? Especially when it defined so much of his personality. When he delivers these reports of the steady decline of road cycling, it reminds me a little bit of my ex-mother-in-law who loved to tell me about the latest cyclist fatality on the roads around her home. "They hate bike riders around here!" she would declare.

If you stay home in bed, you might get bitten by a Brown Recluse spider. They love beds. And they hate people. I've heard that.

Specialized did us a favor

 

A customer ordered this bike online from Specialized. It was one of two. He tried to assemble his own. When he hit a snag, he decided to bring this one -- his wife's -- to us without trying to do anything himself.

Because he said he managed to do everything except size the shifter cable correctly on his own bike, I expected to find the usual online bike in a box, pretty close to complete. Instead I found a project akin to doing a colonoscopy on C3PO.

This bike, a Specialized Como SL 4.0, was designed to look like a picture of a bike drawn by someone who has never looked closely at a bike. The hydraulic brake lines and shift cable are routed into the handlebar within inches of their requisite levers. The brake lines and cable housing are not seen again until they emerge near the brake calipers and rear hub respectively.

Whoever assembles this bike is expected to feed the brake lines and shifter cable from the top of the head tube into the base of the handlebar stem and out through the proper side of the bar to the correct exit. These are not sinuous cords that curl easily into the contortions necessary. The assembly video (there is no printed manual) shows the Park Tool internal cable threading tool, which is a clever and effective device. But even that is not sufficient to ease the whole trip. I don't know if the customer bought himself one or just winged it. We'll find out when he brings his flubbed effort to us.

There is absolutely no margin for error in sizing the brake lines, and nearly none with the shift cable. In the picture you can see that I tried to get away with leaving the front brake line the length that it came. This is because the line already had the barbed fitting in the end of it, and no spare fitting was provided. The TRP brake appears to be a special makeup just for Specialized. You can salvage a barbed fitting from the end of a brake line, but you can't count on being able to. I'm guessing that the remaining Specialized dealers after they downsized a few years ago have the requisite parts on hand. We have an assortment of fittings, but not these specific ones.

The front brake has a problem I still have to diagnose. The lever feel was rock hard, then suddenly went "sploot" (picture a Don Martin cartoon in Mad Magazine). It went totally squishy, but there was no splurge of escaping brake fluid. A few pumps of the lever brought it back to a reasonable travel and resistance, but the pads are now clamped against the rotor. It's even worse than an overfilled SRAM brake, and those are pretty bad. But those are easily cured, and consistently too tight. The "sploot" indicates a mysterious ailment.

At least the fluid is mineral oil, so when it goes all over the place while I'm doing the bleed with so little room to operate it won't eat the paint off this piece of crap.

The assembly video lists the TRP bleed kit as one of the required tools, but never shows the brake lines being trimmed or the system being bled. It just shows the technician/spokesmodel uncapping the lines and connecting them to the levers. Ta daaa! Turbo: It's you only better... or some bullshit like that.

I'm happier than ever that the Big S tossed us in the dumpster after our decades supporting their brand. Their disloyalty to us saves us from having to put a good face on utter crap like this. The owner of this bike would have to work on it themselves or pay a shop to do it. I don't know what sort of loss a Specialized dealer would be expected to eat for the time consuming mess of this needless puzzle, or what an independent shop would charge for the time consuming annoyance. It's apparently supposed to be so easy even a consumer could do it. Maybe not knowing any better is an advantage. If you have no basis for comparison, it just becomes another comedy bit, like assembling flat-pack furniture. You do it once, and when the bike craps out you just replace it.

Correcting a long held misconception

 Conservatism in its best sense means a cautious acceptance of change. Changes have to represent actual improvement. Things get murky from there, as various factions debate what is an improvement.

Science is conservative in its insistence on peer review and repeatable results. The method is methodical in the strictest sense.

Evolution of technology throws ideas into the world to fend for themselves, often with very little testing beforehand. Get something so it sorta kinda works and throw it out there for eager early adopters to risk their lives on. That approach dominated the 1990s mountain bike tech boom. Companies competed not only to invent and refine parts and systems that actually worked, but to market whatever they made to an eager and largely uneducated public, to make customers pay for the R&D. Let riders in the field break stuff on their own dime rather than pay for exhaustive testing before unleashing the next latest and greatest transitory offering from the firehose of obsolescence.

During this time, I judged each new thing on the totality of its merits: initial function, longevity, and serviceability. Some was good. A lot was bad.

Drive train manufacturers each defended their proprietary shifting systems, which meant that we had three or four different freehub spline patterns duking it out in the marketplace for a couple of years. While I agreed that the freehub concept put the rear axle bearings in a better position to support the axle, I recalled that freewheel threads had seemed like a pretty universal standard. And that is the misconception that got corrected last week.

I'd been fortunate in my time as a rider and novice mechanic never to encounter a freewheel thread disparity. In the 1970s, anyone who tried to do their own bike work learned about nationalistic thread pitches and other variations, like Italian bottom bracket shells, weird tire sizes, things like that. Because I didn't read myself to sleep with Sutherland's every night, I missed a lot. One or two of my bikier friends had copies, but I only looked into them when I needed specific information, like spoke lengths for a wheel I was building.

So: last week I started in on a complete overhaul for a customer's 1980s Panasonic road bike. I was told that he had done a lot of his own work, but wanted to have the bike gone over professionally before a big trip he was planning this summer. The bike was old enough actually to be serviceable, so I had no misgivings. It looked well used, but not too weird.

At some point, someone had installed a sealed bottom bracket, so I wouldn't be opening that up. The pedals didn't look serviceable, either. The BB is central, often the first place I'll start. Pedals that do have serviceable bearings are the pickiest components to work on because the ball bearings themselves are tiny, and adjustment can be hard to secure. I chose to start with the rear hub.

The wheels don't match. The front has a Joy Tech hub and Araya rim, probably original. The rear wheel had a Campagnolo Record hub and a Mavic rim. The freewheel looked like a Suntour two-notch Winner 7-speed. But no brand name was visible, and the notches looked slightly atypical.

Suntour freewheels can present problems, especially the four-notch models. The tool has to be very carefully secured. The two-notch models are generally more robust, but you can't rush them.

I secured the tool in the deep recess presented by the seventh cog, so I couldn't see what was going on in there. The tool slipped when I applied leverage with the big Park wrench. I examined the damage and determined that the tool couldn't seat fully. I dug in a bin of other old freewheel tools for one that looked like it would engage more fully. No luck. It didn't mar things, but it didn't budge the freewheel, either. I started examining the various elements of the puzzle more closely.

I'd had to remove the locknut, spacers, and hub cone from the drive side to get the tool to seat. Markings on the cone indicated that it might not be English thread. That sent me to Sutherland's to look for all possible variants of the Campy hub, and freewheel threading. And there it was: French threads don't play nicely with any other type of threads. This rider had an English thread hub and had graunched a French thread freewheel onto it. It can't have gone on smoothly. That thing is never coming off.

Best guess from internet image searching, it's a Maillard.

You can overhaul a hub without removing the freewheel...sometimes. This is one of those times. It won't be as clean or quick as a complete disassembly, but it will be better than the loose and crunchy mess he had.

As I removed cones from the axle, I felt that they presented continuous resistance. This could have been from crud in the threads. But no, I noticed a tiny curl of metal coming off as I painstakingly unscrewed the cones and fought them off over the slightly buggered threads that had held in the dropouts. Once I had the axle out I could see that someone had ham-fisted the Campy cones onto a generic Asian axle. Yeah, you could do it, with steady force, as long as you don't care about the damage to the threads. The axle was also too long for the 126mm spacing of the rear triangle. I dug up a new axle with appropriate threading. 

Replacement axles used to be very reasonably priced. Now, however, very few people must be buying them, because they're stunningly expensive. Like, they were between ten and twenty bucks retail all through the 1990s and early 21st Century. Now they're more than $40. You could buy a functional Shimano RS400 rear hub for about the same money. Now, if you were fixing up something that was really good in its day, a $40 axle might make sense, especially if you enjoy thumbing your nose at the industry. The cost of a good time just keeps going up. Inflation.

The bike may originally have had only six speeds in the rear. I can't tell from shifter clicks, because the right-side downtube shifter is permanently jammed between the index and friction settings. It makes a scraping, rasping sound when you shift it. I would recommend friction shifting anyway, because it allows you to use any freewheel or cassette that will fit in there. Number of speeds doesn't matter. All of my road bikes have personalized 9-speed cassettes running with 8-speed chains.

The controlling factor on chain width, aside from whether you get interference on the cassette, is whether the front derailleur cage fits closely enough to shift efficiently between chainrings.

My acceptance of a technology reflects a constant cost-benefit analysis. The new crap might offer some specific advantages, but are they worth it for the average rider compared to the added expense and pain in the ass that they bring? The stone age simplicity of nice bike componentry from the 1970s into the 1990s provides reliability and durability to general purpose riders of all types. Racers and technical specialists, regardless of competency, will need the more temperamental, expensive tools and weapons at the cutting edge. The rest of us can have a sporty good time on the old-fashioned stuff, or a facsimile made from the remaining offerings still on the market.

In conclusion, any time you thread things together, don't keep going if they don't go smoothly. Find a copy of Sutherland's. Check out Sheldon Brown's old site. If you have multiple options in your parts stash, feel around for a combination that works easily. 

Is bike commuting "ableist?"

 46 years ago, when I started my life as a full time member of the workforce, rather than a student, I did it as a bike commuter. I have used the bike for transportation to work at least some of every year since then.

At the start, the motives were economic and physical. I knew I couldn't count on a high income, or necessarily a steady one. I also knew that I like to eat tasty food, and that my family had a tendency to run to fat. Throughout my childhood I listened to my parents complain about their need to diet. Exercise wasn't part of any adult's normal life in the white-collar middle class. Every one of them faced a physical decline considered inevitable. Might as well joke about it, and keep buying bigger pants.

As the 1960s rolled on into the 1970s, exercise for adults became a mainstream thing. Jogging and running emerged as respectable, even cool, pastimes. By the 1980s, fitness centers had become an industry. Rolling parallel to that rode the ten-speed boom, which merged into the mountain bike boom.

During the ten-speed boom, bike touring and transportation cycling offered ways to beat the shocking rise of gasoline prices as they rocketed toward a whole dollar a gallon. We'd flip a U-turn in the middle of a busy six-lane arterial roadway now to get into a gas station selling for a dollar a gallon, but after decades of regular gas at 30 cents a gallon or less, a dollar a gallon seemed like onrushing doom. Even so, biking to work was always a fringe activity.

I'm sure that the petroleum industry has not noticed my absence, despite a lifetime commitment to limit my consumption. I can attest that it has saved me thousands of dollars, but admit that it has limited my returns from the economy that every other human voted to pursue instead.

The stubbornness of motor vehicle culture used to arouse my annoyance and contempt. These are not helpful emotions for advocacy. They're a response to the annoyance and contempt directed at me as a cyclist. They're mostly dulled now, worn out from overstimulation, but also tempered by a broader understanding of the complexity of people's transportation needs. Yes, a vast number of people could use something other than a full-size motor vehicle to move themselves and their stuff around, but that leaves many more whose lives would be much more complicated if they tried to rely entirely on walking, biking, and public transportation.

I love the simplicity of using my car when I need the load capacity, speed, and effortless range that it provides. I just dump my crap in the back and head out, in normal clothes, to zip around 80 or a hundred miles of accumulated errands in a few hours. The same circuit on a bike would take a couple of days. And there is no public transportation where I live.

I still roll my eyes at the pickup truck craze. "Gas is sooo expensive! I need a bigger truck!" I don't want to hear the bitching. Plus I have to fit in the lane with these behemoths. But they do pull a nice draft when they go by.

I don't even know what the proper term is for the disabled now. In my lifetime I have seen their emergence from shut-in and shunned to just another category in the workforce. Lots still to be done, but the debate has now taken the dark turn of almost officially discussing euthanasia. Just kill the wounded and put them out of their misery. Pretty dark. Leaning instead toward accommodation, what's the balance between meatheads like me who are willing to live at least part of the year like it's an extended bike tour or stage race, and people who physically can't?

We debate how to spend public money in a rich country that pretends to be a poor one. 

You can't plan for every detail. Some things just have to evolve and adapt as experience accumulates. For the most part, around here, drivers seem to be willing to make the minimal effort to go around rather than over me. Other riders tell me about being hit by a car. I have no answer for that. Riders can make mistakes that put themselves more at risk, but drivers can also either space it or make a malicious choice. As riders, we count on drivers making the choice to steer around us as they overtake. Coming from any other direction than behind us, drivers will be in our field of view. We have tactical options.

Fear of collision has driven many riders to quit using the public roads. There are roads I avoid because of traffic speed and density. Any built up area will have greater traffic density and potentially dangerous speeds. In those circumstances, drivers have less attention and patience for pedalers. Pedalers have less acceleration and speed to work within the traffic flow. Maybe they have route alternatives. Maybe not.

Mountain bikers have to worry about losing access to trails because land owners don't want them around anymore. Road riders don't have to worry about losing access to the public right of way. We just have to worry about encountering the wrong nut job who doesn't want us around anymore.

Road riding has weathered legal challenges, like a Maryland legislative push in the early 1980s that would have cut us off from anything with a speed limit above 30 miles per hour, as I recall. Something crazy like that. These are bound to crop up again. But for the most part the laws seem pretty permissive. They leave it to natural predation to keep our numbers in check. "You don't pay road taxes! I'm going to kill you!"

Transportation cycling can be a beneficial element in the traffic mix. I'm a lot easier to pass when I'm riding my bike than when I'm in my car, stuck in the lane in front of you. Drivers have contempt for cyclists, but real hatred for each other. So, because I am able to ride a bike, I actually help lower the emotional temperature out there. This does change with the number of cyclists and their behavior. Lots of riders give us a bad name with antics that either just look bad to motorists or are outright dangerous. 

The "looks bad but is actually good" category presents a challenge, because it includes running stop signs. This doesn't apply to all stop signs all the time. But it's generally better for a rider to be passed on a flowing stretch of road than to have a motorist decide on their own that they can and should squeeze past at an intersection.

Red lights are a different story. Rarely will I run one because I can't be sure that I won't overlook a hazard in my push to flow through. Also, it sets you up to be passed by the same motorists over and over. They get more and more steamed at having not only to stop and go and stop and go, but to accommodate the rider block after block. Cycling fundamentalists will say fuck 'em for being motorists, but fundamentalists at anything only make life worse. You need empathy and flexibility, even if you don't feel like you're getting it in return most of the time. I'll actually fall back a bit at a red light, to get more vehicles past me when they're stopped or moving slowly. At the very least I hold my place so that the ones who have "beaten" me get to keep their medals.

So: If you're able to use a bike some or most of the time, try it. If you're not sure, try it a few times in different contexts to see if you can start to fit it in. If you can't, you can't. 

Waste is not just a personal choice

 I'm cleaning up e-bikes for a very wealthy customer. They need parts replaced because of careless maintenance and poor storage. I was told by their property caretaker that the bikes are fairly new. The parts aren't worn. They're corroded. Brake rotors deeply pitted. Aluminum parts beginning to bubble their paint as white blisters of oxide form underneath it. Chains rusted to rebar.

As the bike industry has suffered shrinkage that was largely self-induced, merging with economic setbacks related to the pandemic, and end-stage capitalism in general, I have less and less patience for the rich and feckless who don't have respect and care for their toys. I compare these bikes to that of a worker who literally rode his ebike to pieces, using it as transportation through the New England winter. I resent the grimy task of trying to remedy rich people's neglect. I will charge them. They will pay. They always have. But, while we wait for parts, their 50-pound pigs are cluttering up the shop's limited storage space.

They waste equipment because they can: a trivial write-off that they excuse because they can afford it. They're creating jobs. But they're also wasting manufactured objects that may be in short supply. They're spitting on the labor that went into making their bikes in the first place -- labor that they wasted by taking crappy care of machines that someone else might have wanted and been able to put to good use.

The brake rotors they need are not in stock right now at our supplier. I will piece together something out of our stock, just to get the bikes out of our way, but that means that anyone who shows up right afterward, while we're still waiting for replacement stock, will not get a quick turnaround, even if they depend on their bike to get them to their subsistence job.

Two of the mounting bolts of the rear brake rotor on one of the bikes are rusted into the hub. The hub is the motor housing. The rotor is heavily rusted. Worst case, they have to buy a whole wheel because the bolts won't come out, but can't be trusted to stay in after all of the efforts to remove them. Drilling them out would require perfect precision to remove only the old bolt without damaging the bolt hole. If threads needed to be repaired, it would require a skilled machine shop, not just a hand tap, because the holes are shallow and blind.

This isn't a metaphor for the destructiveness of wealth. It's a flat-out demonstration of it. The attitude became prevalent in the 1980s, as we accelerated away from the early surge of the environmental movement and our flirtation with social consciousness based around the gains of the civil rights and women's movements, and the anti-war sentiments stimulated by the Vietnam War. The pursuit of personal wealth became the main focus of society. The sole measure of whether you should do something was whether you could pay for it. You didn't even need the money, as long as you could get the credit approved. That, incidentally, is why the economy collapsed at the end of the decade, ushering in the 1990s on a recession. Eventually you run out of places to transfer your balance, and actually have to pay something.

Economy is hard. We have unemployment when more people need jobs than jobs need people. We make poor provisions for the players on the bench, because we tend not to think of them as such. We just hope they're still alive and functional when we need to put them in the game. An actual pro team pays those reserves. Not the free market, though. Social safety nets are stigmatized. Employers know that people are busily manufacturing more people, so someone will be around for the next call-up. Industrialization views people as interchangeable parts. Life is cheap and individuals are common.

The winners in the economy take what they want of land, possessions, experiences, and delegate as much as possible of the grubby chores. Their contribution to the economy consists of the money they didn't pay to some laborers, redirected to as little as they can get away with paying to selected other laborers. What are their actual job skills, and why are they worth that much to the rest of us? It's an honest question.

I value real services provided by people who might not have to exert much or get physically dirty in the course of a work day. I can still ask what's fair on a basis other than "whatever the market will bear." The market is driven by marketing. What if things we've been conditioned to condone as lucrative are complete bullshit? I'll bet you can think of a few. I know I can. But only an impossibly detailed audit could disclose all of them and devise a genuinely fair pay scale.

Down here in the middle and lower reaches of the current income scale, we tend to hire each other to do things for which we personally don't have the tools and knowledge. Pure self sufficiency is a myth. It doesn't even exist at the level of photosynthesis. All of life depends on some kind of external input. The higher you go on the income scale, the more you find people who can delegate everything, providing only money and demanding satisfaction.

The level of demand varies widely. People with only one billion dollars look up the steep face of the mountain above them to the lofty heights where the multi-billionaires live and feel like they're one of us little people. Billionaires are people too. They're just as capable of expressing appreciation, even as some scrabbling dubs can be real jerks about paying for services rendered. I could tell you stories... But even as I recall a few, I realize that they're based on a sense of economic asymmetry. We were the richie rich bike shop in the richie rich lakeside town, and the customer was a hardworking dirt digger from that place between the luxury of the lakeshore and the tourist dollars of the mountains: a no-man's land where even the glaciers just dropped their junk and left all life to fend as best it could on scraped rock, gravel, and sand.

This particular time presents a new level of challenge, with the economic policies of the current regime and the unrest associated with the threat posed by their authoritarian governing style. The bike business already suffered from a number of ongoing forces bent on squeezing us into a smaller and smaller social and economic space. Biking in general suffered from the industry's attempts to create consumer dependency. Now all of those struggles wiggle through the obstacles presented by a drop in tourism, and reduced spending by consumers in general.

We still see people who seem oblivious to the instability. Consumer confidence is supposedly low, but some of the individual consumers who show up to spend seem almost dangerously manic. By and large, people buying things ask the same questions that they always have. Buying a bike, they ask about its features and benefits. Getting a bike repaired, they ask if it's worth fixing, and how much it will cost. They're little islands of normality scattered through days where hours pass without a phone call or a customer coming in. It's in those hours and silences that we see the effects of uncertainty.

Repairs are trickling in. Usually they flood as soon as the weather gets warm. The warmth has not come on in a steady rise, but the waves of chill are shorter and more above freezing. It's been years since we had a "normal" bike season. Those years depended on circumstances that will never be repeated. So we feel our way. We try to be ready for customer needs...and wants...

And on to the next dream...

 After finishing the e-bike stretch cruiser it was time to replace the shifters and crank on a beautiful late-1990s Dean. The bike might actually date from right after the turn of the century. We've been seeing it in the workshop nearly every spring or summer for a long time. I built those wheels more than ten years ago. Maybe so long ago that we looked up parts in a printed catalog and placed orders by phone.

The picture above shows the bike after its recent changes. Originally, it had a Campagnolo Chorus crank, Record 10-speed brifters, and Centaur derailleurs. I vaguely recall that we had already upgraded it from 9-speed to ten-speed by the turn of the century, but we did work on a number of Campy-equipped bikes. Campagnolo actually provided instructions for changing some internal parts in a brifter to change the number of speeds. And, of course, the internals were completely repairable. But the shifter bodies and so many internal parts on this bike were now so worn that repair would have cost a lot more than a new set of brifters.

A lot of years had passed, but Campagnolo had always been the leader in backwards compatibility. You can buy quite a few parts for a 25-year-old shifter, although some of them are being phased out. During that 25 years, the parts fit models that spanned more than eight years, which is phenomenal in the post-Shimano era of technological hyperactivity.

The rider wanted lower gearing than the 53-42 chainrings on his existing crankset. Campy's 135mm bolt circle limits how small a ring you can fit, and they have to match that proprietary bolt pattern. Back when Campy's BCD was 144, other manufacturers copied it. Then Shimano and the Japanese makers brought in the 130 bolt circle diameter, and the industry shifted to that. This meant that you could put on the 53-39 combination that became the de facto standard for road cranks for years. You could even get a 38 for the inner ring, but few did.

When compact road cranks came in, they used the 110mm BCD that mountain bike chainrings were using. Mountain bikes still used triple chainrings. Road compact cranks were designed for just two rings up front. While the young and strong would combine the new little 50-tooth big ring with an 11-tooth cog for the hardest one on the cassette, the 50-34 combination that was most common served as sort of a secret granny gear for riders who were starting to feel a little faded as age took its toll.

So many years had passed before the owner of the Dean felt the need to gear down that a nice compact double for ten-speed was tricky to find. I also recommended trying to match the aesthetic of the old steel frame rather than sticking some aerospace monstrosity on there. I suggested, and he agreed, to get a Velo Orange Grand Cru Drillium crankset. It was actually a little more retro than the bike, but it's also fairly affordable and distinctive compared to the monotonous hellscape of soulless modern componentry.

It's actually made by IRD. But Velo Orange has their Grand Cru badge applied to it, and they deserve support for being such a friend to the retro rider.

The owner dropped the bike off in late March, 2024. I was able to get the brifters and bottom bracket right away. The crank was shown as out of stock for a month or so. The customer was willing to wait. That ETA got kicked down the road a month or two at a time, all the way to the end of the year. We nearly lost the job entirely, but I had contacted Velo Orange directly by that time, to confirm that they were still going to have the cranks at all. We got the customer to hang on. The crank finally arrived a week or two ago. We were still in ski mode, so I didn't start the job right away. We were also buried in the stretch cruiser project, which had been plagued with its own spec problems, but those had resolved more quickly.

As I dug into the Dean, I discovered that the slop in the shifters had been masking slop in the derailleurs. They were very floppy. That led me to look at what we could get for Campy 10-speed derailleurs.

Nothing. That's what we can get for Campy 10-speed derailleurs. Not a zippin' thing. Zippity doodah. Zilch. Nada. Campagnolo has abandoned their faithful long-term customers actually worse than Shimano. Shimano at least still makes some 10-speed road derailleurs for mechanical shifting, with brifters to match, for those who are addicted. For the friction shifters, the truly free, we can buy whatever derailleur we like the looks of and can afford. But for the brifter-dependent, the company that launched the industry into technofascism still has a little lifeline hanging out for the laggards still nursing their older stuff.

Funny: fascism was actually invented in Italy, and the Italian company was the slowest to adopt technofascism. But they're racing to catch up now. Be sure to shell out massive bucks for their 12-speed electronic stuff. It's kind of nice to see them back to duking it out for pro team spec, but the game has no soul anymore, so what are we really winning?

Way way back, in the 1970s and early 1980s, you could actually get every part of a Campagnolo derailleur, separately, to replace what might have gotten bent or cracked in a crash or a workshop mishap. It was treacherously easy to strip the threads on a front derailleur swing arm when tightening the cable anchor bolt. Good thing you could buy just the arm, install it, and pledge to use a lighter touch after that. You could also crack the clamp band, tightening the derailleur on the seat tube. Again: press the rivet out, replace the band, put on the new one and be more sensitive, you clod. Do you caress your lover with those awkward, loutish hands?

Well yes, yes I did, which explains my long spells of monkish solitude, but anyway... You can't get parts to rebuild a derailleur anymore. Long gone, though I do recall seeing them as late as the early 21st Century. I'll have to dig into my archive of Quality catalogs. QBP's print catalogs used to provide such complete tech information that we could figure out a lot of repairs and compatibility puzzles just from what they included about each product.

I had recommended that the customer stick with Campy because of their legendary durability and product support. Seems like I should have investigated them a little more deeply before charging ahead with this job. The customer and I were both trying to extend the life of existing parts rather than junk stuff and start over. Now, if he isn't satisfied with how this thing shifts, we have no option that doesn't cost him a chunk of change to take a different tack.

These shifters seem less substantial than they used to be, and the upshift thumb lever impedes removing the rubber hood to mount the brifter or run cables.

They also only fit 4mm shift cable housing, which means that we can't fit them with the easier-running 5mm which cures so many shifting problems.

Just like Shimano, Campy declares that their shifting systems and drive trains have to be completely matched, 11-speed with 11-speed, 12-speed with 12-speed, end to end. While I would be inclined to test them, trying to graft in 11-speed derailleurs with these 10-speed brifters, the lowest priced front derailleur retails for about $60, and they don't even list an 11-speed rear derailleur. So then we're experimenting with a 12-speed rear derailleur costing more than $200. Or we go on the hunt for good used, and new old stock.

If we talk him into friction barcons, he either eats the cost of the 10-speed brifters and buys some nice brake levers on top of the barcon price, or he uses the brifters as brake levers only, which looks kind of weird and accentuates our defeat at the hands of the technofascists. And all of this is just so that we can graft in whatever derailleurs he wants to try. Whatever derailleurs he wants to try includes pretty much anything on the market if he shifts in friction. They just have to have the gear range and chain capacity to match what he has. And friction shifters will be much more forgiving of the slop in the old derailleurs. He could just keep running those until they totally flop off.

I'm insanely loyal to old machines that I've grown to love. Aided by my own mechanical knowledge, friction shifters, and access to parts, I will keep my own stuff going for decades. I provide the same service to any customers or friends who want to cultivate and maintain the ancestral riding skills. It bums me out deeply when a customer decides to euthanize an old bike because they fall for the lure of the new and exotic, or just decide that something old isn't worth spending money on. I can't afford to rescue any of them, let alone all of them. And I always feel guilty if my enthusiasm for bike immortality and persistence in the face of a challenge leaves them with a result that they're not delighted with.

The industry makes it increasingly hard. Any of us interested in the deathless bike need to pay constant attention to keep track of something that might have been replaceable that has now turned into a vital organ to be preserved. Friction shifting can cover a lot of situations, but it can't work around systems that the industry completely abandons, like certain chainring sizes, or cassettes for proprietary freehub bodies. I'm looking at you again, Campy. While it's contemptible on one level that the entire rest of the industry adopted Shimano's Hyperglide spline pattern, it does create a de facto cassette standard that makes mix and match a lot easier.

I do have a Campy-equipped carcass in the shop basement that might yield donor organs, but it might be 9- or even 8-speed. It's that old. I have defended it against many a clutter purge over the years. Vindication would be sweet. I'm not into losing to the industry and the throwaway mentality.